| Home recording and general music post from the archived Yabb Recording Website Message Board. Some of the info here may be outdated but many of the audio recording and home studio tips are still good. Note: The only tags I made and attempt to convert are italics, bold, center and underline. So if you see some gibberish surrounded by brackets, just ignore it.
Recording Website Archived Yabb board Post
Febuary 2001 Yabb Message Board Archive
Subject: PLEASE CRITIQUE - WILL YOU COME
by distantsun | 06/07/01 at 13:49:26
Folks, After I realised That my style may well be sorta lost on this group, this is the last throw of the dice :) :)
'Will You Come'
V1
Is this as good as it gets?
When will it start
The ice age is warm
Next to your heart
V2
Has it happened yet?
Have your senses found a home
Or are you hell bent on
Living your life all alone
Ch
I'm staring at the sun
Lying on the ground
You say I'm the one
But will you come around?
Around to your senses
These broken defences
I've been burnt by your sun
Will you come?
V3
Do you like staying at home?
Does that cell ever ring?
Are you completely satisfied
Not doing anything?
V4
Can you sleep at night
Alone in the pad
Where the voice tell you
All that is bad
Bridge
And I laugh it of
but you cant break it up
Ch
I'm staring at the sun
Lying on the ground
You say that I'm the one
but will you come around
Around to your senses
These broken defences
I've been burnt by your sun
Will You Come?
Will You Come Around?
Will You Come?
Ah, Will You Come?
Copyright 2000
Ash Wassell
Subject: Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE - WILL YOU COME
by DGR | 06/08/01 at 10:32:10
Hi Ash. Your style certainly isn't lost on me ... though I'm imagining the music does most of your heavy lifting. I say this because lyrically, there are a few intriguing phrases ... just enough to place with the right riffs here and there throughout. But it doesn't seem to rely quite as heavily on "wordcraft" as the stuff you see on these boards.
The reason for this is pretty simple, a lot of folks here and elsewhere write only lyrics ... they're not musicians. That's no sin, of course ... but it does mean a certain "verbal" gravitational pull is the dominant one.
So that being said ... as an indie-alt rock lyric, this should get the job done, provided you've got a "sound" for it. It's a little 'monochromatic' from a subject standpoint, and the imagery is a little 'mannered' ... but again, this is just a judgement call on a virtual page in the silent vacuum of cyberspace.
Hope this helps and all the best. Hang around a little longer, by the way, traffic is slow on this particular board ... don't take it personally! :)
Don Rowe