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Return to: Archives · The Freedom Exchange Subject: Song Posted by: air_man VERSE In a time of why Under a darkened sky Who cares to mind About life for a while I can see you coming Not so far away C'mon romance me Take away my pain BRIDGE All the times I chased the shadows on the wall Listened through your bedroom wall CHORUS Destroyed a lover I took them all Destroyed a lover I took them all A very mellow song this one with sweet harmonies. Let me know your thoughts. Subject: Re: Song Posted by: Hobes A lyric doesn't have to carry a lot of information, but IMHO this one needs a little more.  You have some nice poetic images going on here, but it's not very clear as to what you're writing about. As the writer, you know what the story is.  The listener doesn't - it's your job to convey that message. "Destroyed a lover I took them all"  doesn't ring with meaning for me.   I can decipher a little bit, but overall I don't really understand what you're trying to get across here.... hobes

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